The Hard Decision

I decided last night that it was the wrong time for my wife and I to be on the television show, Montel Williams. My poor wife has been on more buisiness trips and our vacation to Hong Kong took alot out of both of us. The trip to New York would be a wham bam experience, not too mention the stress of just doing the show even if it were in our own backyard. For me, I can use a little more time, and get thru the steps further. I don't think that is enough of a reason by it's self not to go, but it is another "straw" so to speak. As well as my family wiggin out, and most of my friends being 50 50 on the whole event. Sarah wants to be here for her brother who just suffered the loss of his friend. One of my main reasons for wanting to go was simply, that I wanted the experience, and I was challenged on that, I was judged as if that was a bad thing. So I would have like a little more time for myself to shore up my reasonings and not allow other people to bully my decisions around, which ultimately has helped in the decision changeing. I know it will happen again, the oppurtunity that is, and I have learned alot from this process. One thing I learned is to keep my business to myself, because all of the opinions just made it harder, all the fears of others that I had to listen to, all the judgemnets. etc. One of the counselors that was to be on the show seems like a real tool any how. There were alot of friends that supported us. They should not be discounted. I appreciate them for letting me learn for myself what is right and wrong.

End DisTruth

I had heard about a bunch of these facts after the Kanye West embarrassment. ( if you don't know what I am talking about look here.) and so I finally found them for myself on someone elses blog. I don't feel like re copying all of the links that back up this persons claims, but it is all there. If you feel there is something that isn't backed up, feel free to let me know and I will get it for you.
The main reason I have posted this, is to help end any remaining bastions of raceism, reverse racesism, or any other predjudice. to do my part towards civil justice and social peace. I am tired of seeing uneducated idiots (that is not racial, because that covers every race, Mr. Sharpton) milk this tired old race card, anytime they do not get there way. One of these days, these people will need to be held accountable for themselves, instead of "the rich" or "the white man" holding them down. And as soon as these same loudmouths can stop calling succesful minorities sellouts and uncle toms, the sooner minority youth will strive to succeed in exponetial numbers.

A Few More Details

On my way home last night, I couldn't help but play the incident over in my head. what that must have been like, for both Jeremy, as well as his friends. To feel so helpless, falling, falling. I wonder what his thoughts were. I hope he wasn't scared. I remember times when I did something that caused me to fall and hurt yself pretty bad, or to run into someone. One time in my car with my wife we were heading down the road, doing just over 50mph, when someone pulled out right in front of us, the roads were wet, we had no control over our destiny. But I only remember being scared after wards. during the event it was all instinctual. trying to survive. trying to keep my wife safe. I suspect the same was true for Jeremy. His friends are going to need psychological help, a traumatic event like that happening right in front of them. I hope they have great support systems thru friends, family, counselors, etc.

Anyhow, this is the follow up article in the news today

Friend Dies In Elavator Accident

Read the article here, it says it all.

My regards go out to Jeremiah, (my brother in law), and all his friends. And to my own brother, all of which knew Jeremy Johnson. (Worm). My most sincere regards.

Drug Induced Haze.

So it has dawned on me today, that I prefer to be sedated. And that is a bit disturbing to me. It used to be in various forms of bad things shich took me away from the trials of life or at least sanded down the rough parts to make them bearable, but now, I have traded in those bad things for supposed good things, I have decided, thanks to, twelve step program, that I am powerless over my addiction and that it is making my life unmanageable. And in a true effort to let go to a higher power, I have had to take seemingly extreme measures to get my head right again. At my last doctor visit, I voluntarily asked to take part of my medication for my bipolar in the day. It makes me very sleepy, borderline “punch” drunk, and very listless. Today is the first day at work that I have done this. And I am getting in and focusing on my job way better. And so far I am very uninterested in partaking in my addiction while at work. ( avery big fear of mine is getting fired because of my addiction, which could still happen at any moment.) But all those sleepy side effects are definitely there. But some of the side affects are almost as tough to get used to as the addiction, or the bipolar illness. I have very shaky hands, my eyes dance and I can’t keep them stationary on an object for very long, I have gained considerable weight, I have more acne, and my libido has fallen to nil. That is the price you pay to have some measure of serenity from addictions and mental illness. So far, my greatest asset, my mind, doesn’t seem to be suffering to much, accept my typing skills have gone down the tube for sure.

Thanks Mom, Love you too!

So things are very stressful today, mostly emotionally. Recently, my wife and I were given an opportunity to potentially be on The Montel Williams Show. I called my mom to share the news, thinking that she would be supportive, however she was not. She blew her top. She did not believe that I should share “our family’s private lives” with the whole world. Ironically, the next day after I told her, my brother in law approached Sarah at work and said that he had heard that we were going to be on television. That meant that my mom told my brother, who told my brother in law. Interesting to me is that I am the one who is wrong by “potentially” airing family dirty laundry, yet when I asked her to not mention the issue to any one else, she said “well I can’t do anything about Pat, I can’t control who he tells”. What!!? Are you serious? Then what is your deal with me? I know what it is, the privacy that my mom wants to protect, is merely the fact that she rules the roost. All she has to do is cry and everyone drops what they are doing to be there. But not me. And it is the same this time. She hates this whole situation, claiming that I am going to be victimized by sensationalism, abused, etc. That is a cover though, because she also alluded to how bugged she was with her and dad being mentioned. By the way, I have no intention of breaking my mother’s anonymity. Except through association, which seems to be bad enough to her. Any how, I will see how this all turns out. We will find out if we are going to be on the show or not today sometime.

Early Day.

It is early as hell and I am at my sister in laws house waiting to take them to the airport. Nothing really exciting going on at 5 in the morning, usually I am just getting up at this time. It is really cold outside and windy. I hate the wind, it reminds me of my home town and how windy t was there. It used to be so windy that it would tear the roofs off of buildings. Anyhow, I am here with my niece and nephew trying to explain “blogs” and they are trying to explain how they use the computer and the internet to do their homework. Funny how tech we can be and completely misunderstand how another person is “techy” even an 8 year old vs. a 29 year old. so that is the thoughts of a person who had to wake up at 4 am.

"Dick" is an Evil Thief

I am very sad this morning. A good friend of mine was the victim of identity fraud. And the real disconcerting part is that it was done by another friend of mine, We will call him "Dick". I have known Dick for 5 years now, he was my first manager when I moved here from Hawaii and the military. He was a really nice guy. He liked to move from job to job alot, but he always seemed to have some kind of plan or method to his madness. Recently his mother passed away and left him a large sum of money. My other friend, we will call "Bob", is an artist, and was in partnership with Dick creating paintings. Well recently a bounced check showed up in "Bob's" account, and upon further research, discovered to his horror that he was overdrawn 30,000 dollars in one account, and 2,000 in another. Dick is no where to be seen or heard. His lease is up in two weeks, but since he used part of the money to buy a car, we figure (speculation) he has skipped the state. He was supposed to be in the process of moving to south Oregon, but Bob has not heard from him in several days. It is also speculation that after recieveing such a large amount of money in his inheritance, that Dick got into gambling. As any important new developments make there way to me, I will post them, but for now the plan is to wait, and pursue him legally. He has done enough damage to be put away for quite awhile. Good luck Bob.

Yes I know I am a little late on this subject, but I was iffy on whether or not to even say anything. But finally today, after seeing the direction the nutty media was going to take the whole event, I couldn’t hold my piece any longer. Ok, so he shot a guy, that sucks, and he waited a day to tell the people, who cares? It is not a matter of national security; it is a matter of a private event. And the situation was not held “secret” as house minority and big mouth, Harry Reed said today. It was merely held on to out of respect for the people involved. I find it interesting how one minute the media, the libs, whoever, want to chastise the administration for trying to be in our every day lives, yet they get all up in arms if they can’t be in the private lives of public figures. Personally, I was surprised this wasn’t painted as some kind of gun rights issue. Here you have the second most powerful member of the administration, a card carrying republican member of the NRA, blows a hole in the chest of his comrade and does not have his card on him. I would have chased that down. But true to the liberal medias form, they are never in touch with the people, nor do they care to be, and they are un predictable as hell.

Back From Hong Kong.

Of course I had to start off by showing the picture of me in the Bentley. It, sadly, was one of the highlights of my trip. Being the materialistic SOB that I am, it wasn’t the culture, it wasn’t the sites, it wasn’t the food (GOD it wasn’t the food, I really don’t like Chinese food.) It was the Bentley that belonged to my friend’s father that he let me and my gorgeous date take from the reception to our hotel. Look at that photo; I belong in one of those cars.
Anyhow, the trip was a blast, and the sites were incredible. I took over a thousand photographs. The very first day that we were there, we got to take helicopters to the island of Macau, which is owned by the Portuguese and is primarily gambling. The second day we explored the tall buildings of Macau and went shopping. Two things that are in abundance in Hong Kong, shopping, and eating.
The third day was the wedding, which was incredible. The location was at our friends grandfathers house, there was a string quartet, which was comprised of members of the Philharmonic, I will include some of those photos as well in this. After the wedding, we were all escorted in a procession of Mercedes to the restaurant, which of course was on the top of some high rise in downtown. Where the food was excellent, the drinks had been flown in from Switzerland. This type of entertaining and luxury went on the entire time, and the scenery was gorgeous, I will wrap it up here and post a bunch of the photos